It is evidently clear from the discussion that the paragraphs that follow the thesis statement are logically organized and all follow the thesis statement and points that are made. Each clearly defines one point that relates to the main topic. The paragraphs also give examples and opinions that are followed by facts. Each of the paragraphs works independently to show the main point of the essay while providing an organization that relates to the overall thesis of the paper. More importantly, each of the paragraphs in the paper moves through a chronological order that defines the process of writing, editing and creating a solid paper. For an individual who is learning to write an essay, this provides effective methods that are logical and supported through the thesis. Even though there are adequate points in the body paragraphs, some of the details provided are irrelevant. The examples that are given and some of the statements made drive away from the main thesis and take away from the objective of the paper. For instance, in paragraph 4, the author begins speaking about organization processes for a thesis paper and not having this as being a distraction. The very next sentence distracts the reader by talking about a television or a younger sister screaming. The reader begins to think about these situations, as opposed to the organization needed to write a paper. The concepts in the paper can be improved with revisions that would enhance the paper. The most important revision to make is from the unnecessary statements and examples that take the reader out of the main subject of the paper.